A while back, my blogging friend To Kiss The Cook messaged me with an interesting proposal.
TKTC: Do you want to attend an event in LA structured around bloggers?
So@24: Are you going to be there?
TKTC: No, but I can get you on the list.
So@24: Mmmm... I dunno. Sounds weird.
TKTC: Open bar.
So@24: My google map is open.
I never thought that this blog would ever carry me places that would provide me with unlimited alcohol. I went into the event head first without really knowing anything about it. Except that the guest list consisted only of bloggers. And something about Axe (yep, the body spray). And that there was an open bar.
Fuck it. Could be interesting.
After work, I ditched the bike and headed straight to the salon. Don't worry, I too thought it was bizarre that this event was taking place at a hair salon. But I wasn't going to question the free booze. I was like Frodo determined to make it to Mordor.
I walked in and was immediately handed a name tag.
Nice Lady @ Counter: You just write what blog you write for in the name space!
So@24's inner monologue: Dammit, I wish I would have chosen a cooler blog name...
I walked around the salon and noticed that the other bloggers there all knew each other. Groups of people gathered around in circles laughing and clinging their drinks.
Needless to say, I b-lined it for the bar. A girl was at the bar and looked over her shoulder once she heard me approaching.
"Hey, how it going? I'm So@24 (I used my real name, I'm not that big of a chauncy)," I said extending an arm.
"Good. I'm _____. What do you blog for?"
I took a large gulp of my vodka soda, "Oh. Uh. -cough- Starting Over at 24? Heh heh heh?"
"Never heard of it. My blog is ____________."
"Hmmmm, I can't say I've read that one."
"Really? It's only been called one of the most influential blogs in LA."
I instantly took another swig of my drink. I figured if there was liquid in my mouth, it would prevent me from laughing or saying something I'd regret later. Who opens a conversation like that anyway?
"Nope. Sorry, I can't say I've read it. But I'll be sure to check it out. Oh! Excuse me, I think those crab cakes are calling my name."
At that point, I was done meeting bloggers. I wandered around the salon aimlessly, trying to figure out what the hell I was there for. A gentleman approached me as I was straightening out a cardboard Axe poster I had accidentally knocked over.
Gentleman: Are you enjoying yourself?
So@24: Yes, thank you. Um, I'm a little embarrassed to ask, but what's the purpose of this event?
Gentleman: We wanted to bring bloggers together to try out Axe's new hair product. We figured you're male, you're single and you blog about it, that this would be a perfect event for you. Would you like to get your hair done by Diana Schmidtke?
So@24: Hair done?
Gentleman: She's the hairdresser for George Clooney and Matt Damon.
So@24: Uh. Okay?
Diana introduced herself and I had a seat. Diana was extremely nice and shot the shit with me before getting down to business.
She dipped her hand in a canister of Axe and massaged my scalp as she went through her spiel about how a lot of guys don't think twice about their hair or the "product" (I didn't even know it was CALLED product) they put in it.
Diana went on to explain how girls really care about how a guy's hair feels when they run their fingers through it. Or when you're watching a movie on the couch and they rest their head on your shoulder. They don't want something crunchy or oily. Bad hair product might be ruining my "game"!
I just smiled and nodded as she finished up her demonstration.
It was great advice. But that's like telling a 12 year old Achilles that someone is going to seriously fuck up his ankle in the distant future. I'd be lucky if I was one of those guys where my HAIR was the most pressing issues with girls.
Oh Diana, if you only knew. Girls running their fingers through my hair? Resting their heads on my shoulder?