Friday, January 9, 2009

Hair Today, Blog Tomorrow

A while back, my blogging friend To Kiss The Cook messaged me with an interesting proposal.

TKTC: Do you want to attend an event in LA structured around bloggers?
So@24: Are you going to be there?
TKTC: No, but I can get you on the list.
So@24: Mmmm... I dunno. Sounds weird.
TKTC: Open bar.
So@24: My google map is open.

I never thought that this blog would ever carry me places that would provide me with unlimited alcohol. I went into the event head first without really knowing anything about it. Except that the guest list consisted only of bloggers. And something about Axe (yep, the body spray). And that there was an open bar.

Fuck it. Could be interesting.

After work, I ditched the bike and headed straight to the salon. Don't worry, I too thought it was bizarre that this event was taking place at a hair salon. But I wasn't going to question the free booze. I was like Frodo determined to make it to Mordor.

I walked in and was immediately handed a name tag.

Nice Lady @ Counter: You just write what blog you write for in the name space!
So@24: Oh.
So@24's inner monologue: Dammit, I wish I would have chosen a cooler blog name...

I walked around the salon and noticed that the other bloggers there all knew each other. Groups of people gathered around in circles laughing and clinging their drinks.

Needless to say, I b-lined it for the bar. A girl was at the bar and looked over her shoulder once she heard me approaching.

"Hey, how it going? I'm So@24 (I used my real name, I'm not that big of a chauncy)," I said extending an arm.

"Good. I'm _____. What do you blog for?"

I took a large gulp of my vodka soda, "Oh. Uh. -cough- Starting Over at 24? Heh heh heh?"

"Never heard of it. My blog is ____________."

"Hmmmm, I can't say I've read that one."

"Really? It's only been called one of the most influential blogs in LA."

I instantly took another swig of my drink. I figured if there was liquid in my mouth, it would prevent me from laughing or saying something I'd regret later. Who opens a conversation like that anyway?

"Nope. Sorry, I can't say I've read it. But I'll be sure to check it out. Oh! Excuse me, I think those crab cakes are calling my name."

At that point, I was done meeting bloggers. I wandered around the salon aimlessly, trying to figure out what the hell I was there for. A gentleman approached me as I was straightening out a cardboard Axe poster I had accidentally knocked over.

Gentleman: Are you enjoying yourself?
So@24: Yes, thank you. Um, I'm a little embarrassed to ask, but what's the purpose of this event?
Gentleman: We wanted to bring bloggers together to try out Axe's new hair product. We figured you're male, you're single and you blog about it, that this would be a perfect event for you. Would you like to get your hair done by Diana Schmidtke?
So@24: Hair done?
Gentleman: She's the hairdresser for George Clooney and Matt Damon.
So@24: Uh. Okay?

Diana introduced herself and I had a seat. Diana was extremely nice and shot the shit with me before getting down to business.

She dipped her hand in a canister of Axe and massaged my scalp as she went through her spiel about how a lot of guys don't think twice about their hair or the "product" (I didn't even know it was CALLED product) they put in it.

Diana went on to explain how girls really care about how a guy's hair feels when they run their fingers through it. Or when you're watching a movie on the couch and they rest their head on your shoulder. They don't want something crunchy or oily. Bad hair product might be ruining my "game"!

I just smiled and nodded as she finished up her demonstration.

It was great advice. But that's like telling a 12 year old Achilles that someone is going to seriously fuck up his ankle in the distant future. I'd be lucky if I was one of those guys where my HAIR was the most pressing issues with girls.

Heels = Bad Hair?

Oh Diana, if you only knew. Girls running their fingers through my hair? Resting their heads on my shoulder?

If only!

95 comments:

Ashley D said...

True, that event does sounds weird. But really, who wants a guy with crunchy hair?

Arielle said...

One guy when a girl IS running her fingers through your hair, you'll be thankful for this handy Axe lesson! (It's true, crunchy hair is not cool).

saratogajean said...

Holy smokes I blogged about archery today, too. Mind meld! Kind of.

Also, that girl sounds like a (insert female equivalent of douchebag). Did she also say she was 'kind of a big deal?' Is that why she was trying to score some free Axe men's hair product?

LBluca77 said...

That does seem like an odd event, but interesting. I probably would have gone too just to see what it was all about. Next time I will go with you and we can stand in the corner and point and make fun of all the people.

Jossie Posie said...

I don't think I would have the guts to go to an event where I knew no one to talk about my blog...basically, your kind of ballsy.

TKTC said...

Hahaha- I'm still happy to put a hit out on that biz. And I'm happy to have initiated you into the corporate dark side. And I make a solemn vow that the next time I invite you to something, I will be there to partake in the open bar WITH you.

And PS, the Axe stuff smells good (I may have also scored some product of my own) and THAT, my friend, is what may lead the fingers into your hair...

Ashley said...

That's really a bunch of bull shit they were feeding you. A man's hair definitely does not make or break a relationship...but at least you got some free pampering out of the deal, eh?

andyhannon said...

Damnit! I knew something was throwing my game off!

I never suspected it was my hair product.

(Do normal people actually say game?)

Debbi said...

Um.
I find that whole evening incredibly odd and sooo uninteresting. Hopefully it wasn't too bad.

But, curiousity kills me... what was the blog that chicky-pooh was so disillusioned into thinking she was 'famous'.???

rawbean said...

This is so hilarious! I can't believe this event:

a) exists
b) was attended by you

You're such a trooper. They don't know how lucky they were to have you.

shorty said...

As If...is the line that came to mind.

Sorry you felt out of place, but if for no other reason, you did get a free drink and a scalp massage, not bad for a days work.

Have a wonderful weekend.

The New Black said...

The salon thing definitely threw me! You're pretty brave; I don't know if I would have gone all on my own. And really, what's with the girl at the bar, and who exactly is calling her blog one of the most influential blogs in LA? Her and her roommate? Sounds like she could afford to be taken down a peg or two...maybe three? :)

jwriter said...

That is weird, but who knew??? I guess you can say now you've had free booze at a blogging convention lol. I'm glad you didn't laugh at that girl, her self-esteem would have been crushed lol.

Trixie Firecracker said...

Hmmm.....murketing at its best!

Ben said...

Wow. The same fingers that touched celebrities have touched you. That makes you a celebrity by osmosis. Or something.

Sassy Britches said...

Okay, delusional chick, WTF?

And look at YOU pulling a Jack and going out on a limb to try something new with nothing to go on! Well done!

However freakishly awkward it may have been.

And yes, take the advice Achilles, no matter how soon or far into the future it may be needed. Good hair is actually a bigger deal than one would think!

ANG* said...

not sure a vodka soda would have stopped me from laughing in that girl's face. you have much more willpower that i ever will. i can't deal with people taking themselves so seriously.

OhMyHeart said...

Heh, I got free tickets to Zumanity in Vegas once, in exchange for writing for it. They didn't even care how many readers I had or anything! The PR/blogging community still have a long way to go to figure each other out...

Did it smell yummy?!! I always did love it when my High School (emphasis on HS) bf sprayed Axe on him. I wonder if we grow out of that...

whatigotsofar said...

I met bloggers once myself. It was a more personal sort of thing. Some blogger from another town was visiting my town and a bunch of local bloggers got together for dinner and drinks. It was nice and something I would do again.
A corporate sponsered event, I dunno. Sounds a bit cheesy for me. If I knew a blogger meeting was going to be an Axe sponsored event (although I use Axe and will endorse it on my blog in exchange for free deodorant) I would skip the event. I just met the people because they seem like nice people on the internet and I wondered if they were the same nice people in reality. They were. I hope they feel the same way about it.

If you get the opportunity to meet up with a group of bloggers for a casual night out without big brother watching over you, I say go for it. But keep an eye on your cornhole, just in case. There are some weirdos out there.

unMuse said...

yikes. i've never liked the smell of Axe or much cologne in general. I prefer the smell of clean clothes and clean skin.

Becca the Brit! said...

Once again loved your latest contribution to the blogging world! Had to laugh at the thought of you re-correcting the cardboard cut-out that you'd knocked over - I do believe you may be the male version of me :0)

MarvelousMOM said...

How very strange! At least there were free drinks!

courtneyryan369 said...

I would have gone for free drinks too.

And I have to say though that oily hair is WORSE than crunch hair.

Maybe we should host our own blogger event and only invite people who aren't influential.

alexa - cleveland's a plum said...

haha, this is some funny shit buddy.

and *gasp* how could you have not know of one of the most influential bloggers in LA?!? vomit.

SS+1 said...

What a series of mixed-fortunate events...

a)Free Booze
b)conceited bloggers (but aren't we all?)
c)getting fed bs about purchasing hair products

I agree, you were a trooper...but then again...FREE BOOZE! :)

Kellie said...

Haven't you heard? My blog is only one of the most influential blogs about drinking yourself into a coma.

Seriously? Come on now girl? Bloggers aren't famous outside of blog la la land. :)

Except for you of course.

Greta said...

What's a chauncy? Like a goober?

The Alleged Ringleader said...

That sounds like SUCH a random party idea... was it all guys only?

Jest said...

I wish I could have gone to this event for the sole purpose of watching your reaction when they girl told her about how influential her blog is.

Phil said...

I think the Influential One just found a sure-fire way to kill any influence she may have thought she had.

Shoot, I'm gay and hardly know a thing about hair care products, except that AXE is for teenagers. My secret to good lucks is not caring, what can I say.

rachel said...

at least there was free booze.

i hate people that call hair "stuff" product. just product. it's weird.

Tee aka The Diva's Thoughts said...

LOL.

Did you at least like the product she put in your hair?

Sparkles+dust said...

No product is best, what was she on about.

Men using 'product' and mosturiser and wearing skinny jeans, the world has gone mad. stay true to manliness!!

If you can remember the blog name of that girl you should put it up, id love to read 'one of the most influential blogs in LA' *snigger*

rs27 said...

You should have told that girl, "Well it's so influential that no one reads it, suck it"

then ran. Ran like the wind.

Alice said...

um.. i'm kind of jealous. i want my hair done by a celebrity stylist!

once you've got a girl on your couch, hairplay is imminent :-)

Marie said...

So what you're saying is you didn't kick that girl? Or perhaps tell her she is full of something that begins with "S"? You are just too polite!

Babs said...

screw LA's most influential blogger! i bet she isn't near as funny as you are

Blaez said...

free booze and free hair advice. what could be more perfect?

lol

Passionista said...

I wish Philly had events where I could meet bloggers AND get my hair done, all while sipping on a vodka tonic. Score!

JerseySjov said...

it's a shame that all of the "product" at the party probably smelled like a highschool boys' locker room after a particularly warm day.
axe on anyone over the age of 15 is...not good. stick to pantene 2-in-1 for good man hair.

Rachel said...

I would have said "Oh yeah? Well I was featured blogger over at 20SB. And that's why I rule and you drool."


Actually, I couldn't say that since I have never been featured, but you get the idea

Narm said...

I'm pretty sure you get to be in the next Ocean's movie now. Oceans 27 - Is Anyone Following The Story Line Or Just Looking At The Pretty People?

In theaters soon.

Leslie said...

oh my. seriously, that blog-o-wonder meetup sounds crazy. weird kinda crazy. secondly, getting your hair done by that famous chick is kind of cool. i've always loved getting my hair washed.

frankly, i still can't understand why you are single. perhaps you should give the tall girls a chance?

xoxo

E said...

Good post ;) Sounds like it was an interesting event to say the least..... lol

Bow Chica Wah Wah said...

Wow it's crazy how there are so many different blogging communities.

You should have told her about your awesome blog

Maxie said...

Did she at least do a good job.

For the record, I love axe commercials. They're hilarious!

Dolce said...

Did you spray on some Axe? Maybe that would help. The men in the commercials get attacked by hot amazon women in elevators and stuff. Maybe you should have asked her to rub that into your hair.

Katelin said...

i almost went to this event! haha. granted i'm pretty sure they had a couple, but i got confused with the rsvp and everything and ended up not going, lame i know.

oh and if she did matt damon's hair i'm pretty sure your hair must look amazing now, mmmmmmatt damon.

floreta said...

ahahaha! what a nerdy event. i love that. getting out in the real world thru blogging. too bad it was sponsored by axe. i don't really give a shit what the guy's hair feels like if i run my fingers thru em..

mistressmom said...

Kinda sucks that you didn't click with anyone at the event, but how'd you like the hair product?

JenBun said...

HA! Too cute!

You should meet more bloggers...

;)

Famously Single said...

When I go in google reader and see you have a new post, I get really excited! Crunchy hair is not really a turn on, but neither is someone who might think they're super cool because the same hands that touched George Clooney or Matt Damon are now touching you head. And it sounds like a lot of people who attended that event thought they were pretty cool already!

The Japxican said...

I admit I have a thing for hair and touching it but I'm always against anything that would make a nice boy like you smell like a douchebag :)

Stephanie said...

Those Axe commercials make me laugh. I always thought they were a little ridic, but actually it smells preeeetty good.

I think that girl telling you her blog was considered one of the most influential blogs in LA was poor form! I would have bailed her for a crabcake too. :)

justaguy said...

how was the hair product? im just a little bit curious.

Your Ill-fitting Overcoat said...

Aw, I love this post.

But where are the pics of your hair-did? Come on, you can blot out your eyes!

S. said...

What's my motivation?! OpenBar.OpenBar.Drink.Drink.Drink.OpenBar.Drink.Drink.

Emmeline said...

uh yeah . . . blogger events do not appeal to me. luckily, they never seem to occur in the middle of the country, so it seems I'm safe. :)

Em

Therapeutic Ramblings said...

I want to go to a blogging event! Chi, Bos, and now LA!

rawbean said...

I think you and "Your Ill Fitting Overcoat" should get together. Has this ever crossed your mind?

ButterflyLion said...

You are a blogstar.

Cheryl said...

I once went on a date with this guy that used wayyy too much wax, and at the start of our date, his hair was gooey, and at the end, there were dried wax flakes falling everywhere This was something like 6 years ago, and I still think about it. Point being, hair is important.

*~Dani~* said...

That sounds like the strangest event ever. Did you get any free hair product out of it?

And the girl with the most influential blog in all of LA? Not really all that influential if nobody has to know about it and you have to tell them, not only its name, but that it's influential.

KatieSaysSo said...

That would be really weird. Lucky for you there was an open bar. Surprised that chick had never heard of your blog though.....(bitch, ha)

Anyways, glad you may have at least got a laugh out of it! =)

it's not a gravy train said...

You mentioned Axe twice and even included the message point that Axe hair product will give you game on your blog that is read by tons of people...I say PR purpose accomplished. tee hee. ;)

But seriously, guys with crunchy hair...ewe, what are you, in a boy band?!?!

Tia said...

I can't believe you didn't know it was called "product"!

you lose major metro points for that one, my dear. =)

Deutlich said...

Oh MAN that chick w/the attitude is bugging me from THIS end of the country. Can I smack her?

Emmie said...

oh no! what an awkward event! Im surprised you lasted so long! I think I would have left har sooner! x

Miss Cellaneous said...

I awarded you the Premio Dardos Award. See here: http://quarterlifequery.blogspot.com/2009/01/awards-season-is-here.html

Scarlett Off Course said...

I hate it when guys put "product" in their hair.

Au natural all the way!

Bird * said...

if your blog were you love life - you would be man whore.

Jen said...

I think it's time to start a blogroll. clue us in on who you read.

OhMyLaughter said...

Awesome. Haha.

At least this is an experience you can cross off of things to do before you die.
Seriously though...
your blog is starting OVER at 24 NOT starting OUT at 24. A girl you really like running her fingers through your hair will inevitably happen again. It's happened before.

I think you need to give yourself more credit for the fact that you have had a long term relationship and have been in love. Not all guys can say that.

The more girls you hang out/go out with as "friends," the more likely one of them will fall for you.

EP said...

Huh. That's strange, but kind of cool.

At least you got your hair did, right? *shrugs*

sequined said...

That's a strange event, but I guess it worked in that it got you to show up and learn about their product. I honestly don't understand targeting bloggers, except in the hopes that bloggers would blog about their product and make people want it...

Oh. That's smart, actually.

In any case, you are brave to go by yourself; I would have kept you company if I lived down there.

.bethany. said...

Someone seriously introduced herself to you as the writer of the most influential blog in L.A.?

I give you props for not laughing - I would have. (especially if I were being treated to an open bar...)

bethis said...

please come to the chicago 20SB meet-up this summer where you will be the real celebrity. that girl with the life-altering amazo-blog is NOT invited.

free hair products, however, ARE invited.

Paige said...

That sounds very weird. I have to admit I probably wouldn't have went to see what it was all about. But even more strange that the girl tried to tell you she was a "big deal" because of her blog.

P.S.
FORGET the hair product, girls in their right minds so would not care! haha

Paige said...

Thank you for your comment to my blog. So very sweet!

MsPuddin said...

ok the next time they have one of these let me know!! And you didn't even meet any bloggers you "knew"?

fun fact: my brother's name is Akili...

!llegally blonde said...

Hahaha the girl's remark about her blog being one of the most influential in LA cracked me up! Sorry, but I really didn't know blogging could be THAT serious.

As for your hair, why don't you post pics? Your gazillion followers are really interested to check your new hair out :D

PS because of some stalker/psychos, I changed my blog's URL to itsbetterinhavana.blogspot.com

CarmenSinCity said...

That's an interesting event. Who would have thought of a hair/open bar thing? I guess someone did. So, how did you hair look???

Auburn Kat said...

At least you got a head massage out of the deal...

Wiwille said...

I can't believe you even went, but then again it's free alcohol.

Exposed said...

You have the most influential blog influencing bloggers to hate the "Most influential blogger in LA". Congrats.

Somos Cinco said...

LOL A Blogging social event- defeats the purpose for those who want to remain anonymous.
*Savinu

Fizzgig said...

at least you went, that takes some nerve. I couldn't have gone alone.

axe. I think they use that pheremone spray you can buy at sex parties.

that stuffs nuts.

The Sexologist said...

So this is all the fancy blog stuff I can look forward to if I get famous? I am dying to know who was the big-head who thinks her blog is the shit...

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

All dudes AND they were trying to push Axe products on you? That is a truly worthless event.

!llegally blonde said...

You're so full of honest scrap :D Drop by my blog bro!

Suzy Q said...

So did you ever check out the most influential blog in LA? hahahaha...

Melrox said...

I missed this one. Out of the other hundreds of your posts I've read I zipped right past this one.

I also want to know if you read the most influential blog?

Most of the time, when a woman is running her fingers through a guys hair, the last thing on their mind is what kind of product is in it or how it feels. There's usually making out going on and other stuff. You know...stuff.

poodlegoose said...

See now, you should have posted your new lady approved locks for us to see instead of, well, you know. A censored statue ;)

And there is no way I'd go to a meeting with my blog as the front runner. I mean, poodlegoose? Could I have come up with a dumber name?

potenta said...

this blog is realy funny...i like so much:)

hair loss treatment said...

Think it's some kind of marketing strategy. Since all guests are blogger, they think you will (surely) blog about the event and spread about their product in the net. Got the idea? Well of course, it was a nice opportunity to mingle with co-blogger and have some free drinks, right? LOL