From: Lynn
Time: 9:42pm
Date: December 17, 2008
Heeeeeey.
All right Nervous Nancy...
So just because Facebook might have awkwardly 'informed' you (and I don't want you finding stuff out about my life that way), I thought you should know that I am seeing someone. Not that you want to hear about that kind of stuff, and not that you like to know, but I figured I should show you the courtesy of telling you instead of you finding out via Facebook.
Anyways he's not my boyfriend yet, and it's still new, but all I did was make a change to my profile and it informed all of Facebook world and everyone is freaking out (i.e.: "ohohohlalala" and "go Lynn!" comments). I assumed you were doing so in private. Hahaha.
Anyways he's not my boyfriend yet, and it's still new, but all I did was make a change to my profile and it informed all of Facebook world and everyone is freaking out (i.e.: "ohohohlalala" and "go Lynn!" comments). I assumed you were doing so in private. Hahaha.
Mmmk so that is that. Dunno how much you want to know, etc... but he knows about you, knows we are close friends, etc and thinks you sound like a cool guy.
Hope we can be cool with all of this... Sorry if I am making it more awkward than it really is.
Come home in one piece beardy and stop obsessing with my roommate :)
- Meeeeeeeee
[Lynn]
To: Lynn
From: So@24
Time: 10:35pm
Date: December 17, 2008
I was waiting for this message to come.
I can't tell you how many gchats, emails and phone calls I got asking me,
And all I could respond with was shrugging my shoulders and saying, "Well, maybe she's in a relationship?"
I don't need to know the details or anything. I'm glad you've found someone and I hope that it blossoms into something great. He just better appreciate everything about you!
You know my only rule for you: No settling!
We're cool as we always have been, no awkwardness... I promise.
Hope things are well (and it sounds like they are) and I'll see you next week!
As for your roommate, you don't need to worry. She's short, cute, funny, and can quote some of the great movies that most girls don't appreciate. Unfortunately, she's your roommate and probably isn't interested in atheists.
Best,
me
[So@24]
[Lynn]
To: Lynn
From: So@24
Time: 10:35pm
Date: December 17, 2008
I was waiting for this message to come.
I can't tell you how many gchats, emails and phone calls I got asking me,
"Dude, what's going on with Lynn? Facebook says Lynn is 'no longer listed as single'. What's going on??"
And all I could respond with was shrugging my shoulders and saying, "Well, maybe she's in a relationship?"
I don't need to know the details or anything. I'm glad you've found someone and I hope that it blossoms into something great. He just better appreciate everything about you!
You know my only rule for you: No settling!
We're cool as we always have been, no awkwardness... I promise.
Hope things are well (and it sounds like they are) and I'll see you next week!
As for your roommate, you don't need to worry. She's short, cute, funny, and can quote some of the great movies that most girls don't appreciate. Unfortunately, she's your roommate and probably isn't interested in atheists.
Best,
me
[So@24]
77 comments:
You know what? I applaud you for being able to be friends with an ex. I could never (and have never been able to) do it. Never.
You are so totally mature. That is about the best reply I can think of. Well done you.
If "he's not [her] boyfriend yet," consider that "it's still new," I don't understand why Lynn would change her Facebook relationship status.
Maybe this will spur you onto to bigger and brighter things in the dating world ?
Either way, i say kudos to you for being so mature about it.
Girls don't appreciate The Jerk, really?
That was really sweet between the both of you :)
I do wonder why she changed her facebook status if she isnt actually with this guy?
Hmmm.. Oh well girls are weird.
Yeah I know I am one.
:)
did u really feel those things or did u jus say them coz u knew thats wat she would be happy to hear...kudos to u if u were true to ur heart. hey, has caitlyn(irish lady) stopped blogging?...i mean its like forever since her last post...
My college ex and I are able to be friends. I found out he was seeing someone via facebook and it didn't sit so well, so I think Lynn did a brave thing by telling you. I only hope that one day I can feel the same way about my most recent ex, but right now, I don't even want to know if he's dating. Maybe it just takes time - or maybe some people hurt you to the point beyond repair...
Being happy for her is all well and good, but where's the "How dare you!" that exists in every man?
I will never be grown up to do that kind of stuff with any of my exes.
Great response. You are some kind of awesome, period.
Is the roomate off limits? You guys seem to be able to handle the friends thing. Good stuff. Hope it goes well if you meet him at home. At least it will make for a good post.
Ohhhh Facebook: Making the smallest developments completely mind-blowing to your entire social circle all at once.
Yay for being cool with it! I say give yourself a pat on the back and a couple drinks in celebration of your maturity.
UUghh seriously I wouldnt want to know about my ex with someone else. I dunno how you do it.
Kudos.
way to keep your cool between both of you. :)
oh and it's hella snowing in seattle right now. i mean thunderstorm and snow!! wish i was somewhere warmer. lol
Weird that you wrote this...I actually had kind of a fling with a co-worker about nine months ago...but it didn't work (not my fault here) and just this morning I found out she was pregnant.
Everyone at work knew we were seeing each other and have had a couple visits to my cubicle this AM to see how I was doing with it.
uh...good for her I guess?
Great reply. Not sure I would have been able to be so diplomatic. Nice one as always :)
I get the impression that you're pretty much the nicest guy, in the entire world. Seriously.
Wow - I'm not so sure I could have handled this. Lucky for me, my ex "married" his brother on Facebook so I didn't have to find out that way.
Being friends with an ex takes some serious guts...good for you!
Facebook status changes how I hate you. I decided that I will never change mine again unless I am married.
You on the other hand, very good reply :-)
Wait, you have a beard?
I'm friends with every ex I've ever had, and being honest and upfront about things that could be potentially awkward really helps maintain the friendship, if you ask me. It's when someone is hiding things that you start to question "why the secrecy" and then things get difficult.
what's with status? i don't get it. my ex just left me a week ago yesterday (i'm not really counting, i promise. just loathing.) and i changed my facebook status from single to "in a relationship." everybody that i know was like "what the fuck?!" .. i mean, come on. do you they really think i'm going to be in a relationship a week after a split? why is social status so important? are we all afraid to be alone? if that's the case, we seriously need to start up the buddy system for adults.
Hm. Interesting. You handled that much better than I ever did with my long term ex. Even though I was completely not interested in dating him again, the thought of him with someone else pissed me off. So well done for being so accepting!
I think you should post pictures of this beard.
you know whats awkward? When facebook told everyone I had herpes....
Ha. Had my ex thought to tell me via an e-mail rather than Facebook, we might still be friends today. Oh well.
Kudos to Lynn for at least being cool about it.
Facebook and myspace are evil about informing people of things they didn't want to know.
I think that is nice Lynn is carring enough to not want you to find these things out that way. Also very mature. Maybe one day I too will be a mature person. But probably not gonna happen.
I think it's awkward that Lynn decided to send you a message to explain herself (status on facebook). If it is truly just friendship between the two of you why the awkwardness on her part?
On the other hand, it is great that you seem to be handling it pretty well....what's up with the roomate? hahaha!
I hate facebook.
I think you handled that great. It was nice that she said something to you and I think it shows how strong and great of a person you are to handle things the way that you do.
Say what you will about the tenents of Aethism, dude. At least it's an ethos.
OK, I felt a little awkward reading that but mostly good. Now I think you need to go on a spree of randomly changing your facebook status just to screw with everyone.
It's awesome you two can be so friendly about everything. I'm working on the whole friends thing with my ex. But unlike you two I am completely immature and bitter about everything and love flashing my 'in a relationship' status to him in any way possible.
But only because he was a jerk.
I appreciate you addressing the relationship status thing. More attention gets paid to that than the economy or global warming.
When I changed mine to "in a relationship," I got more comments than if I would have had my obituary in the paper.
ah, good ol facebook. I think at this point even if i did get a boyfriend, I would keep my status as single until i was married. just too much info for others to see. I always feel bad when I see people go from "it's complicated" "single" and back again.
Totally found out last week that my ex has a new girlfriend. Via Facebook. To his credit, he'd tried to call me a few days before and I wasn't around, so maybe he was trying to give me a heads up. Fortunately, I'm in a place with him where I could just be happy for him about it and it wasn't awkward. But I did think it was funny!
Oh, wow.
I think I'd die first.
By the way, I met your twin last weekend. Seriously, I nearly asked if he was SO24 from Blogger. Can you imagine the look on the guy's face? Yeesh. Yeah, you have a twin - and he's gorgeous, at that.
Very, very mature of you. Very well said.
Not bad. IMO, she made it more awkward than necessary, but still no biggie. And good answer from you as well.
I did like her little joke, "I assumed you were doing so in private." Glad you guys can still be sarcastic with each other.
Em
For one dollar I'll guess your weight, your height, or your sex.
No?
Fine.
Good response. Not that any of us would expect less from you.
I think that was great for her to tell you herself. Props to Lynn. And you? You like her roomie? What gives? We haven't heard anything about her that I recall...
If only all couples could be that mature, but I'm curious how honest both of you were in your email exchange. Do you think the conversation would have the same tone on the phone or in person?
i think it's hilarious that everyone always freaks out about facebook status's...i am sometimes guilty too, haha. but i still love that you guys are still so close and no awkwardness, that's clutch.
i heart other atheists. it makes for a lot less problems in relationships. I want a shirt that says "you must be at least this agnostic to ride this ride."
I only read the first few comments, but she didn't CHANGE her status; she REMOVED it. However, she really should alter her setting, like I did, so that these things don't become big deals. Relationships are personal, anyway... not meant to attract an audience.
I have never been able to be friends with an ex. That's like a completely foreign concept to me.
Maybe if they ended up being decent like Lynn.
hey you are freaking awesome to be so calm now! good for you.
& btw, why do ppl seem to ask you questions about your ex (where are they at? whats their number? ect, ect,) when your OBVIOUSLY NOT WITH THEM? lol
SO dumb.
Aaaww, you two are so sweet and mature and stuff.
well played, both of you.
i HAVE been friends with ex (even while they date others) and it really can absolutely happen. honest. :-)
oh and I just finally followed your link. I LOVE The Jerk. I miss the drugged out Steve Martin. He was brilliant. Don't trust whitey.
yea, that whole exchange was so together. I dont speak to my exes. But then again, they are all assholes.
I am still having email exchanges like this with my ex, three years later. It's weird, but good I guess.
ya'll are so different than me and my ex(s) {I couldn't figure out how to make 'ex' plural and didn't want to look like a jack off}
we pretend the other doesn't exist, even in public. yes, sad, yes immature, yes I am terrible at dating/break-ups.
do you think you will make the same courtesy call when you find someone worth changing facebook for?
fucking facebook.
is the beard a winter thing?
Interesting. Drama, Drama, Drama.
You guys are definitely in a good place-- that's awesome!
Happy Holidays, SO, and have fun at home!! :)
Yeah, I SUCK at being friends with exes, so GOOD JOB! :)
Great response!
My ex does not want to be friends with me lol and he was the one who fucked up... go figure.
*Savinu
best?!? really? ;-P
i don't want to know anything about my ex's life. just better that way. already associate too much with him, if i knew where he lived or what his job was, etc. i don't think i would ever be able to think of those things without thinking of him.
after all the recent crap i've been through with ken....quite honestly, i wish that i could be this cool about that kinda stuff.
but i don't thin its meant to be.
so....props to you friend for being a bigger person than i. xo, babsy
Doesn't a little piece of you just die with news like this?
Anyway, way to rock the guy friend role.. and embrace the awkwardness like a champ.
I'm pretty sure you know you are a nice guy. And you know facebook is annoying...so I feel no need to repeat either.
Are there other girls you have a deep connection like this with? Form one (or more) and one (or more) of those girls will fallll for you. Girls are emotional and they often just can't help it.
oh facebook... sharing everyone personal business with the entire world... Its great that you guys can still be friends and ok with all that!
Sometimes I get unnecessarily defensive of you, and when I read her email I thought, "ugh, don't treat him like a baby! He can handle it!" But you're more mature than I am.
you did good buddy, you did good.
you can say you are married to me on facebook if you want to.
Kudos to you, and her, for being so mature about the whole situation
How are you feeling?
I'm so impressed with your response! Congrats! I think you and Lynn can just be friends after all (sorry I had my doubts, but experiences precede me).
I once got a call from an Ex who told me he was dating a girl I knew. I guess it was nice of him but I couldn't help but be annoyed. I totally faked it though and said "oh you couldn't have picked a nicer girl!"
AS IF. It's never cool. It may be easier than it was a year ago, but it will never be 100% cool as a cucumber.
Whoah that was almost simultaneous posting.
And by the way, I meant it may be easier for YOU now that it was a year ago, but you can never be 100%. I actually think you're too nice to this Lynn fella, I mean lady.
atheist??
Though I know I'm taller than you, you are totally a bigger man than I am.
WOW. I admire you for being and staying cool while it was something awkward on your part. Your readers said it already but I would like to repeat that 'twas an action full of maturity. :)
This was very cute. Thank you. :)
Good for both of you for handling it well. Very few people can do that. Fucking Facebook.
Facebook does tell too much of your business. I agree with you when you said some post ago if I'm over 25 and still have a myspace page something is wrong lol. You and your ex are really open and honest with one another. That is something a lot of people are not able to do. Hopefully the dating scene will pick up for you soon, although it maybe that some of us just ain't the dating type and work better in relationships. Then again what the heck do I know lol.
Way to go! I'm happy that y'all are still friends despite everything, and you can have a regular (albiet e-mail) conversation like that. I cannot ever imagine having a conversation like that with one of my exes.
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