And you take a lot of rum shots?
And then you find out later that you said and/or did some really cool things? Especially to the opposite sex?
"Friends" of mine recently uncovered three gems from Leo's party on Saturday.
I can't make this shit up.
1. A cute girl named Viola was in attendance. All throughout the night I harassed her by bellowing across the party, "Viiiiiiiiiiiii-OHHHHHHHH-LAAAAAAAAAA!"
I'm not sure why in my inebriated state I thought to pull out an old Ricola commercial and change it up Weird Al style to incorporate her name into it.
Apparently I think I'm being witty/original and that girls like their unique sounding names associated with commercials about Swiss mountaineers shouting about their cough drops through a large alphorn.
2.
3. So@24: Hey Marie! Glad you could make it to the party!
Marie: Absolutely. Wow, were you just dancing to Micheal Jackson's "Beat It"? Alone?
So@24: Whoa, your shoulder is really soft.
Marie: Thanks.
So@24: It's like, dickskin soft.
Marie: Did you just say that my shoulder is dickskin soft?
So@24: You know how dickskin is really soft?
Marie: Yeah I guess it is.
So@24: See? It's a compliment.
I rule.
79 comments:
How is it that you're still single?
:)
Seriously?
You rock :)
Dickskin soft. Whoa. I'm all for poetic references but dickskin? Whoa.
All are humbled by the rum god.
You stay classy, San Dickskino.
three gems? i read two... where's the third?!
hahaha dickskin.
That's priceless.
If it makes you feel any better I got really drunk once and told a guy, "I bet you have a really smooth penis."
na, not embarrassing at all.
Dickskin soft - that's extremely creative for someone who was drinking rum from a plastic cup all night.
Way to bring it home with the American Beauty reference.
I think Charmin should incorporate the dickskin soft idea.
Wow! I think you just started a new pick-up line.
Wow. Some night you have had.
A girl in high school was named Victoria. But everytime she walked into class we would sing "Victoria" instead of Notorious.
Dickskin soft? Really? You, dear sir, have just created a new craze.
Ahahah I loved that part in American Beauty! I can just hear him saying it now. Man, he really told that bitch.
HAHA I laughed so hard hard I snorted.
Oh darlin' and I thought I'd heard some good lines. GREAT JOB!
Can you come to NY for my next party? The lesbian midget strippers are busy.
Holy smokes. I'm worried I'm going to say "dickskin soft" the next time I'm drunk. And by worried, I mean I can't freaking wait to bust that shit out. I just hope I don't say it to my mom.
Thats hilarious but not so bad. Once I was drunk on gin and while doing the nasty passed out on top of her and she proceded to roll me off where i lay naked for the rest of the people in the house to see for hours. Your's is a funny story not a complete embarassment so keep up spitting the game
Ahhh... SO@24, I have to inquire - rum as in Bacardi Rum? If it was, indeed, Bacardi, then no explanation needed.
Not that I'm speaking from experience or anything *cough*
That's hilarious. And I don't know if I'm impressed or confused about how you fit in that last still of American Beauty, lol.
LOL Dickskin soft...you know that is a compliment because it really is so very soft...
And sorry I didn't let you personally know I was going to be in the LA area, I'll let you know when I move up there and maybe we can meet up blogger style for booze :)
..."dickskin soft"?
AHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh my god. That is the greatest thing I've ever heard. Don't ever change.
I'm pretty sure this dickskin comment means you are gay. good luck with that...
seriously can we get drunk together and dance to michael jackson? sounds like my kind of night, haha.
Wow.
Who says that? Really? I'm laughing so hard right now, but I'm going to strongly advise you to NOT include that line on your dating profile!
Um, OHMIGAWD!
Dickskin? I'm still reeling from that one.
Ohmigawd!
Ah, the magic of Rum and Michael Jackson. Should have stirred those two ingredients a little more liberally into your online dating profile.
I've gotta go home and put some lotion on my shoulders. Maybe they'll get bigger, too.
...Oh dear.
Now that girl is gonna go tell everyone, "Hey! Feel my shoulder! It's dickskin soft!"
Its really her own fault for having the name Viola.
She had to have seen that one coming, right?
oh dear god!
Now that I think of it...I guess it is kinda soft isnt it? lol
Histerical
HAHAHA, dickskin soft. Forget babybums, I'd take a dick over a babies butt ANYDAY!
(yep, random stalking your blog.)
Sheepskin is a thing of the past. It's all about Dickskin now.
There are no words. This post is way too awesome.
P.S. That is my favorite part of American Beauty.
I did not know that "dickskin soft" could be a compliment.
You are fucking hilarious. I want to be at a party with you. I live in Santa Barbara... we could probably make that happen!
I'll buy the second round if you write about how awesome I am in your blog. lol.
Holy cow! That last one is classic. I am going to try to incorporate it into my verbage. Maybe not at the office though. You drunk = hilarity!
Dude, you're awesome.
Dickskin soft. I love it. Totally better than "smooth as a babys butt" because who wants to touch a babys butt?
You are the absolute laughter highlight of my day!
I have NO idea how you are still single. Seriously, I would be all over you :)
Oh man, seeing that American Beauty pic makes me want to steal you, hide you in my basement in a cage and just bask in your awesomeness...
Hey, where you going?
rum shots?
I have nothing to say about this.
Ummm...
Huh.
I like the Ricola. And the dance. The dickskin soft comment? Ehhhh... you were drunk.
;)
sorry to go off topic! but you've been tagged for a meme!
http://geminiwitchtwin.blogspot.com/2008/09/quirks.html
Why is all the Rum gone?
I, for one, am impressed.
You are killing me!! lol
This is such an appropriate post since I've been reflecting on my own drinking times from this past weekend and the dumb things I said. Thanks for letting me know I'm not alone!
PS love the finger snap...I do it too.
PPS. What kind of clothes do you want me to buy you?
Yea, I should come party with you in L.A. - we could have a rum shot contest. ;)
I am actually planning a trip down there soon.
OMG! I wish I would have been there!!!
Oh.My.
Sorta wished I could have witnessed that though. I might have joined you in dancing to MJ.
Speaking of... when I was sixteen I did a tap dance to Beat It (not alone though... with the rest of my dance class). Yeah, try to work that one out in your head. But somehow it worked.
Haha. At first, I read it as "Dickinson" and I didn't get it. But then I did, and I felt a little sad for you. I mean, it was a creative reference and all, but you know. No action.
Also, American Beauty? Good call.
wow... dickskin soft huh? Too funny!
Thanks for leaving a comment xD by the way...I´m sorry about Leo´s leaving...you´ll be fine..sometimes..it is good to be on your own for a while... xoxo
Dickskin soft. Brilliant.
HA! the second picture reminds me of myself at my last get together. Everyone was playing wii and I sat out a few games of bowling and danced in the corner. By myself. It was fun. (Course not as fun as the nights the girls get on my oak low-boy coffee table and dance.)
Well there's nothing to lose, and there's nothing to prove. I'll be dancing with myself..
You are fucking ridiculous and I am PROUD to call you my friend! Can I feel your dickskin? Just to be sure?
I have nothing smart ass to say. I think you pretty much covered it all on your own.
FBhint:726493779
whoa SO - blinds here wants to feel it! proving that sometimes good things can come from making a total ass of yourself...nice...
AAAAHAHAHAHAHA.
Bro you kill me. dickskin soft... classic. Everyone from work went out last night and got loser pissed, and I'm sitting in my office right now still drunk I think. That post made my day. Thanks!
the ricola reference - oh my gosh.
my name is nycala (or if you reside in the uk 'nicola')
ricola jokes and I go way back. use it, I'll slap you
creativity sir, creativity
none the less...american beauty reference, way to wrap it up
MJ's Beat It is one of the best songs of all time. I would have been right there next to you snapping away. :)
Also, you made me LOL at work, so I totally just got busted for not doing something work related b/c nothing is ever funny in this office. :)
Have to agree. You do rule. How could anyone not find you adorable at that party? Your tie alone would get me goin'.
That picture is pure genius.
you seem to have a unique sense of humor when you're drunk that other drunk people don't follow? haha
Lol!!!
I just had to leave a message saying I'm in the exact same spot, except am female!
Started dating my ex at 18, now 24 and single. lol crazyness!! is damn hard work out there in the single/dating world.
All the best!
Dickskin soft... thank you, thank you, thank you! I will be laughing about that for days.
Dickskin soft is now my new descriptive term of choice.
Unless, of course, you've patented it.
(which I would, if I were you)
Dickskin soft = hilarious. And the American Beauty reference = brilliant.
Bahahahahahahah
you are hilarious. Like scripted reality TV hilarious.
I also thought it was funny how you had 69 comments ;)
That's pretty incredible! I wouldn't have thought of dickskin soft as a compliment of sorts, but I get it now. Kinda. Though I would probably have to laugh if someone said it to me...
And this post is exactly why I do not drink rum. Bad/incredible, unexplainable things happen.
You know...I would've probably done the same thing. It's not our fault Vicola and Ricola rhyme. She should thank her parents for giving her such an awesome name.
I'm not gonna lie, you made me laugh out loud on the dickskin exchange. I mean, you can't deny that you have a point. I'm not gonna lie, if a guy used that on me, I'd be putty in his hands. Oh that we could all have skin that is dickskin soft...
In other news, this entry is so full of amazing references...I mean, it doesn't get much better than Michael Jackson and American Beauty...
I love that old commercial, and now I love it even more that you harassed someone with it.
and is dickskin soft different than foreskin soft
i am so using the dickskin line tonight. seriously.
Hahahaha. I believe I was right on the other side of that picture playing pool thinking how awesome you were for dancing by yourself. Honestly. It shows confidence. And it got a cute girl to come and dance with you too!
LOL=)
I just laughed for 10 min straight. You are hilarious!
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