Wednesday, February 6, 2008
I Can't Be Sexy
So@24: My fortune cookies says that I am "open and honest with my philosophy on love"
Beth: Bow chicka bow wow
So@24: That's the first thing you thought of? Wtf!?
Beth: I imagined you in a satin red button up shirt that showed your chest hair. On a big red heart pillow.
So@24: Do I have an ice bucket with a bottle of champagne? Does the heart shaped bed have a coin slot on the side so it can vibrate?
Beth: Hell yes. And your disco ball has a subtle spin. I can hear Barry White's soothing voice filling the room.
So@24: I imagine you opening the door, but you're carrying 3 bags of heavy groceries, a winter jacket in jeans and a scarf.
"What the hell is this? Knock it off and help me carry these groceries in."
Beth: That's exactly how it would be. Except now I'm thinking your satin shirt would be a satin robe. The kind that cuts off before the knee.
So@24: Then the record scratches and Barry would be interrupted.
"You know you're cleaning up these petals you dumped all over the floor, right?"
"Oh. Uh. Of course."