I'm a lazy, lazy man. And I really hate shaving.
Last week, I made a joke to Leo that I was going to grow the beard out. He actually challenged me to do so and now I'm on day 12. I must say, it's coming in quite nicely. Much better than I thought. I even got a couple compliments from the party! "I usually don't like facial hair, but it looks good!"
This isn't going to last though, I'm mostly doing it for the comedic effect. This bad boy is going to be lopped off when I return home this weekend, after I show Mimi. I promised her that I'd keep it until she saw it in person.
However...
A girl who I was friends with in college (not extremely close) called me last night out of the blue to tell me she's in town for the weekend. Tonight is my last night in LA before returning home, so tonight is it. I never thought too much of her when we were in school (girlfriend at the time, remember?), but she's looking pretty cute these days. In town. One night. Be cool, So, be cool.
Do I really want her to see me for the first time with my awkward beard? It's funny, yes. But I'm pretty sure I'm not putting my best foot forward looking like Judge Ito.
I have a few hours to make a decision. Do I keep the beard and embrace my humorous side? Or do I shave and avoid looking like the shifty eyed bar fly who sips his Wild Turkey (neat, of course), sitting on a bar stool in the corner, ashing his lone cigarette on his snake skinned boots?
Who knew that trolling for booty would force me to make these tough choices?
21 comments:
Paul Bunyan had a beard. And he had blue ox. AN OX. Who wouldn't fuck Paul Bunyan?
Keep it, man. And then ask her if she wants a mustache ride.
i can't believe you said, "trolling for booty." wowzas.
Shave it into a muttonchop-mustache combo, a la Derek Smalls from Spinal Tap. That's an awesome look for anyone.
Hey, you're in L.A., right? Tell her you're growing it for a part in a movie. When I lived there, it happened so often no one even thought twice about it.
Or, tell her you're employer is about to send you overseas on assignment and you need to "fit in." That just screams "mystery" and "intrigue!"
I think girls like it a little rough around the edge, it makes you look like a bad boy
You know my feelings on this. Just think how much more glorious the conquest if upon waking accompanied in your bed tomorrow you can reach up and stroke your virile beard. Your laugh will be deeper, you'll enjoy a hearty breakfast of steak and eggs, probably wear some flannel. Come on, who doesn't love flannel?
Wait - tonight's your last night in LA? Where do you really live?
MB - "Maybe I will, and then I'll put it on my feet and stand on Paul Bunyan's giant skillet to cook his flapjacks!"
Les - Dude. I stole that from you.
Redgrave - Way ahead of you, buddy. I think that'll take me awhile to get there though.
Average - Absolutely brilliant. I really like alluding to the idea that I work in espionage.
NYC - Exactly! I'm sick of looking like I just got my permit. Time to step out of the kiddie pool and into adulthood!
CCR - I can't wait for it go get long enough for me to flip it over my shoulder after I spin on my heels during an argument.
Exy - I'm just heading back to Seattle for Thanksgiving break. I'll be back in LA in a week. We should grab drinks! SNAPS!
Keep the damn thing. It'll be a good conversation starter, right? She's known you forever, a little change in the appearance might mix things up=)
u are asian aren't you? i doubt it is coming in nicely. we asians aren't hairy. shave it so u can get laid and tell me about it later.
1) It's Samson. No "p."
2) I'd like to refer you to a former blog of mine when I asked whether I should grow facial hair and your resultant comments. Let me know if you need a link.
3) You're coming home this weekend?
4) Which girl?
5) Trolling?
... Honestly. Trolling?
so it's patchy?
Full beard, trimmed: Hot
patch beary, wiry: not so hot
I am still talking about male facial hair, for the record.
We need photographic evidence. That photo at the top of the post makes it look like your an aged Amish-Asian farmer. I would say grow it out but I would have to see it first.
And it has to be manly. My people grow manly beards (I'm half Irish and half Syrian) but we also tend to blow shit up a lot. It's a bit of a trade off.
I think most women prefer a boysih clean shaven face. Why would you want to cover that face up? LOL@ Judge Ito
In the quest for booty, I say shave it off and show her your spunky self sans facial fluff.
You can grow a beard any old time, but you might not get to play hide the pickle with this girl ever again. :)
IF you get any sexy time with her, let me just tell you it's a lot less distracting have a freshly-shaven face near your sensitive parts.
But a little stubble is super-sexy, so it's up to you.
Ps, ever seen Knocked Up? al I can think of is the bet they had with their roommate and then verbally abused him as part of the deal :)
ps, i'm turning 21 this weekend, so if you're going to be going out anytime this weekend, we may bump into each other. Belltown, friday night?
Heyyy I tagged you for a meme :)
Elyce - Success (kind of)! She actually liked it!
DOTM - Yes. Well, half actually. The other half of me is white. So believe it or not, it's coming in nicely.
Trial - I hate you.
Tiff - HAHAHA! I lost track of what we were talking about. I'm right in the middle of those two. I think I'll stick it out.
GiveEm - My friend Trial (see above) made that for "beardo" picture for me in college. Completely random. Don't worry, I don't look like I came out of that show "David the Gnome"
Mouthy - It won't be around for long, but I wanted to see what it felt like to actually look like a man instead of my boyish 14 year old face!
Betty - Yeah, you're right. I can't keep up this charade for much longer. It'll be gone soon!
BLGG - It's such a delicate balance, isn't it? This beard is stressing me out! I totally thought about that Knocked Up reference when I first started this! Hilarious!
Kate - I hit you back!
i'm a 1/4 white--does that mean we have mostly white babies?
Heh. Trolling for booty is one of my favorite sports.
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